Yes, indeed, today is JONJ's 3rd birthday! Happy Birthday JONJ!
At this rate, JONJ will be bar mitzvah in 2019 with over 2600 profiles. That's...man, we love this site. Love writing it, love posting it, love the response it gets (yes, even the haters). But if we hit profile #2600....let's just say someone else will be doing the writing chores by then.
There's the old quote that eventually, each of us will get our 15 minutes of fame. Apparently, (and Stephen Jay Gould is proof of this) each of us will be receiving our 15 minutes as a guest shot on the Simpsons. Who knew? (I can't wait to be Comic Book Guy's long lost brother!)
Stephen Jay Gould was suggested by....me, actually. Why I thought anyone would care is a mystery for the ages.....
Seriously, Rocky IV. I love the Mercedes in Siberia; Russians driving troikas in the snow (what is this, 1890?); and leather seats in the horse carriage... Seriously... What the hell were these people thinking?
And the talking robot. Let's not forget the talking robot.
Sometimes this happens. I sit down to write a nice, friendly profile, get about halfway through it, think about what I'm actually saying, get angry, and then rip the whole subject to shreds. You can pretty much see the progression here, "Timon's a nice fellow...la la la....Disney needs Jews...What the hell...Timon's a ****ing loser and I hope he dies." Well, maybe not that bad.
Anyway, this little excursion into my addiction to rage-ohol was brought to you by suggester Danni from Perth and by the letter A and the number 5.
Moishe and I spent a lot of time on this profile—probably more than was necessary—but we think the end result was really worth the effort and we think you will, too. Of all the profiles we've done, honestly, this is one of the ones I'm most proud of.
UPDATE: Some people have reported they are having trouble loading the profile. We went in and fixed the problem as of 8:05 this morning and it is now working normally. Thanks for your patience!
This profile was written for a reason... other than, you know, to profile Neve Campbell. We really do get the "why don't you always mark people as Jewish if their mother is Jewish"? The answer is in the link above...
We've joked before about getting into knock-down, drag-out fights over profiles before. Well it's all fun and games until a real argument breaks out and this one really was hardcore. I was on the "Jew" side, for the record, and Moishe and I were back and forth all freakin' weekend in virtual screaming matches over the e-mails with links and counterlinks until I found myself interrupting real conversations to fire off another missive on the possibility of Paul's Judaism.
Which, of course, turned out to be for naught. So yes we really did all this research (OK, Moishe did it, I'm a slack ass) and I'm proven wrong (once again) and he's proven right (once again) and if it sounds to you like we're an old married couple then you're right because essentially we are.
Married by a love of finding and writing about Jews. Is it crazy that we went through all this for one random profile? Maybe, but not nearly as crazy as how much we enjoyed doing it.
Paul was suggested by readers Antonio from California and Harry from Parts Unknown.
This is how JONJ often works: I watch a re-run of "The Larry Sanders Show". I laugh. I think to myself, "Garry Shandling is Jewish. We should profile him." I try to think of anything interesting to say. I can't think of anything. I ask Yakov whether Shandling would make a good profile. He says, sure. He can't think of anything interesting either. I file Shandling away. For months. I spend these months humming the theme to the "It's Garry Shandling's Show": This is the theme to Garry's show, the opening theme to Garry's show, Garry called me up and asked if I could write his theme song... Everyone around me is annoyed. At some point, I realize that the only way I can stop humming is to write the profile... and a profile is born.
Fascinating, I know.
Shandling took a little hit in the scores because he is now a Jewish Buddhist. Whatever that means.
The story that Gene Roddenberry would have you believe (and the one we propagate with this profile) is that he added Walter Koenig as Checkhov in Season 2 of Star Trek to satisfy the cries of Russians everywhere that they, the pioneers of space, ought to be included in the crew. It's not true.
Koenig was added to try to bring in young female viewers with someone who looked like (frightening to comprehend now) teen idol Davy Jones of the Monkees. This is confirmed by William Shatner in his book. Did it work? Considering the show was cancelled after Season 3, we're gonna say no.
That leaves us with only one question: What teen idol does Anton Yelchin look like? Glancing at the picture above we're going to have to say....none.
Anyway, Yelchin was suggested by Olivia from Winnipeg. Thanks Olivia!
Good news, JONJ fans! We're back on a 5-profile-a-week schedule, with the simple posting rate of each weekday morning. So every time you come to work, there'll be a fresh new JONJ profile! (Unless you're in Europe, then you have to wait until the afternoon... Or in Asia... Do we have any fans in Asia?)
Of course, you can also subscribe to the JONJ RSS Feed to always be alerted immediately.
For those of you who are curious about George's amazing adventure as described above, check out this. There's something so satisfying in knowing that the nazis were beaten by a fictional monkey (well, his creators, but still)...
Thanks to multiple-time suggester and one-time profiler Pamela from North Carolina.
The poker monster has only demanded two trips to Las Vegas thus far (it has me in AC right freakin' NOW though, so it's all good). Meanwhile, I've yet to stay at the Wynn. Unfortunately, this means I can't review the hotel for those parties who may be interested in visiting. But, for the record, Mandalay Bay and Bellagio are nice enough.
As a side note, with casinos themed Italian, Roman, Egyptian, Parisian, New Yorken, etc. why not design a Jewish one? I mean, besides the obvious negative stereotypes that already exist with the correlation of Jews and money, name one good reason!
OK, so it's probably never gonna happen, but we can dream....