Friday, October 29, 2010

Profile: Logan Lerman

I forgot to mention this new movie is gonna be in 3D. Ugh. And here I thought nothing can top the shittiness of Jim Caviezel in 2002's "The Count of Monte Cristo"...

Lerman was suggested by returning suggester Anne from Dallas, as well as Julie from Toronto and Mike from Hartford.

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Profile: Craig Breslow

Returning suggester Joe from Scranton tipped us to the smartest athletes article, which led to this profile. Also suggested by... many other returning suggesters: Bruce from LA (he sent it in August of... 2008!), Karen from San Diego (she loves those (former) Padres), Bob from Fairfield, IA, as well as Howard from NY.

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Profile: Richard Wagner

There is a memorable "Curb Your Enthusiasm" episode when Larry is berated for liking Wagner...

Wagner was recommended by Dana from Wisconsin and Karl from Australia.

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Profile: Meatwad

Sadly, Yakov is busy with his day job, and I can't tell Meatwad from an ordinary hairy meatball... In any case, the suggestion came from Brett from Maryland.

Monday, October 25, 2010

Profile: Dianna Agron

And... here we go: Jonathan from LA, Hannah from England, Joelle from North Carolina, Brian from Philly, Dana from Mountain View, CA, and Koby from Israel.

Now, please, can we stop with Glee profiles? Please? Please...

Friday, October 22, 2010

Profile: Tom Bosley

We've obviously been swamped with suggestions to profile Bosley after his death this Tuesday. Repeat suggesters Harry from New York, JeriAnn from New York, Bruce from Cambridge, IL, as well as Steve from Pennsylvania and Gary from DC. But what's really spooky is a suggestion that came a week BEFORE Bosley's death, from Michael from Glencoe, IL.

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Profile: Count of St. Germain

We don't usually link Wikipedia, but for those not familiar with the mysterious Count, here's the article.

Thanks to Slava from Baltimore for the suggestion.

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Profile: Carla Bruni

So, Carla, Carla, Carla...

The subject of our old blog feature, "Weird Search of the Day", turns out to be not so not-Jewish after all... Thanks to Avi from Madrid for tipping us.

Another person infatuated with Carla? Woody Allen, who went out of his way to give her a small part in next year's "Midnight in Paris".

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Profile: David Schwimmer

As a male, of the three Friends, best case scenario is people compare you to Joey. Yes, he's an idiot. But he's a popular idiot. And really that's all that matters.

We suppose, if you can't be Joey to the ladies, you could live with being Chandler. Oh, it's not ideal, but you can't have everyone be Joey so Chandler is a good second choice.

But to be told by a woman that you're "a Ross"? Feh. She might as well buy you a bright neon sign that says "Hello, I will not be getting laid anytime soon."

Schwimmer was suggested by Tali from South Africa, Richard from Chicago, Jelle from Antwerp, Rotem from Florida, and Andrea from Irvine, CA.

Monday, October 18, 2010

Jews in the News: Another Jewish Nobel laureate

Aha! It looks like the Jewishness of Nobel Physics laureate Andre Geim has been proven. Geim, who is a Dutch citizen who resides in the UK, was born in Russia of German ancestry. But in an interview with an Israeli newspaper, he admits to having a Jewish maternal grandmother.


Profile: Langston Hughes

No, not one we saw coming. In more ways than one.

Hughes was suggested by Shane from Claremont, NH.

Friday, October 15, 2010

Profile: Ivanka Trump

How much did we like "The Apprentice"? We were THIS close to profiling Rebecca Jarvis, the runner-up in Season 4 (she should have WON!).

Ivanka was suggested by Bobby from Spain, Mara from Kansas, Valerie from Ontario, Nina from Toronto, and Randy from Los Angeles.

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Profile: Mordecai "Three Finger" Brown

Now THIS is more like it. Baseball players, FTW! Three Finger (and don't we all miss the days when players had nicknames like Three Finger) was suggested by Ari from NY, and the mysteriously named Nuretro from NJ. Thanks guys!

Moishe would also like me to point out that Brown was Mr. Burns' top choice for pitcher on his Power Plant softball team on The Simpsons. Considering his team was made up of all dead-ballers (i.e., pre-Babe Ruth), most of his roster makes sense. But if I needed one pitcher from that era to pitch a game with my life on the line, I'm taking Walter Johnson (and probably Christy Matthewson) before I take Brown.

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

JONJ in the New Yorker

Well, well, well. The New Yorker. Sure, it's only the online version, and sure, it's just a link (on the topic of the Berenstain Bears, of everything!), but... well, well, well.

Profile: Laszlo Biro

I came back from the birth of my daughter and--properly inspired--sat down and wrote two profiles based around pens (scroll down at little for Montblanc). Hashem only knows how THAT confluence came about....

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Profile: David Guetta

Guetta was suggested by: Jacobo from Madrid, Daniel from London, Luca from Rome, Adam from New Zealand, and Ben from Davis, CA. See, the Europeans care. And New Zealanders. And at least one person in Davis, CA.

Monday, October 11, 2010

Jews in the News: Peter Diamond wins the Nobel

They sure made us sweat this year. After being shut out of Nobel's first five prizes, we got one in the Economics category, as MIT economist Peter Diamond shared the prize with Dale Mortensen and Christopher Pissarides.

Profile: Malin Akerman

Malin was suggested by the good pornographers people at Egotastic! (See this post.) Hers was another blurb we wrote up, but it never made the website. (We also wrote one for Heidi Montag. BARF.)

Friday, October 8, 2010

Profile: Montblanc International

This profile is in no way autobiographical. I received the skinny Montblanc for my bar mitzvah.

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Profile: Suze Orman

Man, that Suze is one prickly (censored). She keeps rejecting all my suggestions!

Orman was suggested by Tom from Arizona.

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Profile: Myer Prinstein

Prinstein was suggested by... No one. No one but me seems to care about all-timey athletes. I read about him on the Sports Legends Revealed blog.

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Profile: Lise Meitner

A bit of a dilemma here; if a person coverts out of Judaism, more often than not they get a "Barely a Jew" verdict. After all, one makes a conscious decision to turn away from Judaism. But in the case of Meitner, as well as another German Jewish scientist, previously profiled Fritz Haber... Well, considering the time and place, we're gonna cut them a little slack. But just a little.

Monday, October 4, 2010

Profile: Reuben Mattus

Yakov wants to let our readers know that he is not the biggest fan of Häagen-Dazs. I say Häagen-Dazs Forever! Let the JONJ ice cream wars begin!

Friday, October 1, 2010

Profile: Korney Chukovsky

Slava from Baltimore suggested Chukovsky, who brings us to 900 profiles. Of course, we previously profiled Chukovsky's most famous character, Doctor Aybolit.

Top 10 Profiles: September

1. Mel Gibson (+1)
2. Sandra Bullock (-1)
3. Jesus Christ (+9)
4. Adolf Hitler (-1)
5. Scarlett Johansson (+3)
6. Jon Hamm (+63)
7. Tina Fey (+7)
8. Julio Iglesias (NEW)
9. Charlie Chaplin (-5)
10. Steve Carell (-5)