Weird Search: January 21

Who else could have been yesterday's top search?

Barack Obama.

Not a Jew.

Not a Muslim either, BTW.

Profile: Michael Bloomberg

http://www.jewornotjew.com/profile.jsp?ID=447

Thanks to reader Elaine from Queens for suggesting her mayor. He has been sitting in our queue for a while; sometimes all we need is a reader to push us that final step.

Weird Search: January 20

Weird Search revoked: January 29, 2009. But we still think it's silly.

This one is just silly.

Mahmoud Ahmadinejad.

Not a Jew.

Profile: Kang and Kodos

http://www.jewornotjew.com/profile.jsp?ID=445

Perhaps one day we will make MaleOrNotMale.com (but don't bet on it). If we ever do, Kodos will be one of the first profiles. You see, in one of the episodes, Kang refers to Kodos as his sister. In other episodes, Kodos is referred to as male.

Maybe the concepts of religion and gender are a bit different on Rigel VII than on Earth?

Who are we to say?

Weird Search: January 19

It's the NFL Conference Championship games, and with the Steelers playing, we get our horde of Ben Roethlisberger inquiries. With them, come some football-related searches. Such as this one.

Joe Montana.

Not a Jew.

Profile: Kobe Bryant

http://www.jewornotjew.com/profile.jsp?ID=448

The idea for this profile came from a story by the humorous sports savants at Deadspin. I happen to agree with them that Kobe probably didn't understand the question...

Weird Search: January 18

Saddam Hussein.

Obviously, not a Jew.

However, Jerry Haleva is. How is Jerry Haleva? Read the profile...

Profile: Ayn Rand

http://www.jewornotjew.com/profile.jsp?ID=446

I first mentioned it in the Leopold Bloom profile, but I hate hate hate that 100 Best Novels list. And the readers' list is even worse.

Weird Search: January 17

Jon Bon Jovi.

Not a Jew.

Now, if his name was Jon Ben Jovi... No, no, no. Still not a Jew.

Profile: Alexander Ovechkin

http://www.jewornotjew.com/profile.jsp?ID=444

Oh, Wikipedia, Wikipedia... That's not the last we've heard from you for sure. Thanks to reader Laynie from Washington, DC for alerting us.

And, in case we weren't clear in the profile, here's another pic, where you clearly see Ovechkin wearing a cross. And to the right is his mother, also wearing a cross. You can see where he gets those lady-killer looks from.

Weird Search: January 16

Julia Roberts.

Not a Jew.

And honestly, how can anyone find her attractive? Those teeth. Yeeesh.

Profile: Winnie-the-Pooh

http://www.jewornotjew.com/profile.jsp?ID=443


Having not read the above text, I can only guess at the twists and turns contained within its covers.

I imagine it begins with Pooh finding a blood-stained dreidel in front of his home. Perturbed, he, Piglet, and Eeyore track the trail of blood and discover the body of a murdered rabbi, smothered in honey, near a river in the Hundred-Acre Wood. Pooh, correctly surmising that someone is trying to frame him, starts interviewing likely suspects. Owl is in prison for grand theft auto and Kanga is too whacked out on heroin to help him, but Roo seems to know more than he/she is letting on. After leaving Piglet to work Roo over, Pooh meets with a mysteriously somber Tigger who tells him that "something awful went down" and "the whole system is corrupt." After a series of red herrings, questionable alibis and a rousing chase scene involving a balloon and a pack of bees, Pooh discovers that the rabbi's grisly murder was just one of a series of despicable hate crimes by Christopher Robin, ably covered for by his patsy (and secret lover) Rabbit. Of course, in the end, Christopher Robin gets away with it by murdering the only witness and Pooh is left with nothing but to return to his home, snort honey, and wonder what's to come of this crazy, unjust world.

On the other hand, the book may just be about the Pooh gang celebrating Chanukah. But I find that less likely since none of them are Jewish.

Weird Search: January 15

Tupac Shakur.

Not a Jew.

Well, duh.

Oh, those meshugenah goyim! Kurt Warner

Believe it or not, not all of discussions between Yakov and myself are about Jews. Sometimes, be it infrequently, we talk about other things. For example, today we spent a good half hour discussing whether Kurt Warner belongs in the Pro Football Hall of Fame.

For those who don't know, Warner came out of nowhere (actually, from stocking shelves in a supermarket), to lead the St. Louis Rams to the Super Bowl title in 1999, winning the league MVP in the process. Two years later, another MVP, another Super Bowl (be it in a losing effort). And now, after a couple of years where everyone deemed him washed-up, he is on the brink of leading the Arizona Cardinals(!) to their first ever trip to the title game.

But since Warner's career has been pretty short and his totals don't compare too favorably to other Hall of Famers, Yakov argues that he doesn't necessarily belong in the Hall. I say that two MVPs and a Super Bowl title, and some of the best averages in league history, do. It's not his fault he career started late. So we go back and forth for a while on this topic. It gets pretty heated. Some chairs are thrown.

And then I realize... why am I try so hard to defend Warner? This is a man who has a "personal relationship" with Jesus. This is a man who says, "Jesus changed my life, and he can change yours too" and "when I throw a touchdown pass, my thoughts are on how I can use this success on the field as a platform to glorify and praise my Lord Jesus Christ."

Brrrr. I change my vote. No Hall of Fame for you, Kurt.

Oh, and after your attempt to draw God... please, please, please, just stick to football.

Oh, those meshugenah goyim!

Profile: Ben Kingsley

http://www.jewornotjew.com/profile.jsp?ID=442

What will Sir Ben be remembered for, playing Gandhi in "Gandhi", or Guru Tugginmypudha in "The Love Guru"?

It's an open-ended question.

Thanks to Norman from Toronto for the suggestion!