Barely Jews in the News: Julian Edelman

Our big thanks to the blog Kaplan's Korner, who contacted the New England Patriots about their rookie receiver, Julian Edelman:

Not, according to the Patriots’ media office, which reported that Julian, a first-year wide receiver out of Kent State “has Jewish ancestry but was raised as a Christian.”^[1]

Edelman had a good game for the Patriots against the Jets in the place of injured Wes Welker, catching eight balls for 98 yards. But, since he's is "Barely a Jew", we'll emphasize the fact that the Patriots lost, 16:9.

January 4, 2010: Edelman is now profiled.

Profile: Jonathan Safran Foer

http://www.jewornotjew.com/profile.jsp?ID=631

I adore "Everything Is Illuminated". "Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close" is pretty good too. And Foer's wife, Nicole Krauss, is the author of the wonderful "The History of Love". Sadly, Jonathan's next book is pro-vegetarianism non-fiction. Maybe I'll just re-read "Illuminated".

Profile: Judge Judy/Judge Wapner

http://www.jewornotjew.com/profile.jsp?ID=628
http://www.jewornotjew.com/profile.jsp?ID=629

Yes it's two — TWO! — two profiles in one! The profile is the same, the picture is different: who will you choose? Stern and sassy Judge Judy or kindly curmudgeon Wapner?

Collect them, race them, trade them — the power is in YOUR hands!

Profile: Tamara and Irina Press

http://www.jewornotjew.com/profile.jsp?ID=630

Here's a better picture of Tamara Press:

but, honestly, she's a shot putter. Exactly how much femininity do you expect in the first place?

I would really want to thank Harry from New York for the suggestion. Because of him, I spent a day trying to write about these fine, fine, fine looking women. Thanks, Harry!

Profile: Stephen Fry

http://www.jewornotjew.com/profile.jsp?ID=627

In England, Fry is known as one half of the Fry and Laurie comedy duo, with the other half being "Dr. House" Hugh Laurie. Not a Jew.

Thanks to reader William from Atlanta for the suggestion.

Profile: Drew Rosenhaus

http://www.jewornotjew.com/profile.jsp?ID=626

Since we just profiled Jerry Maguire, his rival agent Bob Sugar, played by Jay Mohr (Not a Jew), is based on Rosenhaus.

And that's enough Jerry Maguire references for now. Seriously... what's next, a Renee Zellweger profile? Let's hope not!

Profile: Melanie Laurent

http://www.jewornotjew.com/profile.jsp?ID=625

Since I already raved about "Basterds", not much more to say. Except that last year, Miss Laurent has directed... a... hmmm... "erotic film". Hmmm indeed.

Profile: Little Mac

http://www.jewornotjew.com/profile.jsp?ID=623

This is a loooooooong profile, but I just couldn't find a way to shorten it. You really need to think about every character to reach the conclusion that we did.

Little Mac is an obscure character in a mostly obscure video game series, but when I think of him as Little Maccabee it just warms my heart so. Our first respectable video game Jew. I'm so proud....

Profile: Jim Schwartz

http://www.jewornotjew.com/profile.jsp?ID=624

Are you ready for some football?

No? Well...Are you ready because the football season starts today whether you're ready or not?

That'll have to do. Anyway, Coach Schwartz was suggested by Danny from Pennsylvania. Thanks Danny!

Oh, and so you know, Moishe at one time considered himself a Lions fan. This is because Moishe enjoys misery....

Profile: Shaun Tomson

http://www.jewornotjew.com/profile.jsp?ID=622

Yet another one in a long line of "Jews don't play this sport, unless they do" profiles. What's left? Polo?

Tomson was suggested by reader Daniel from Los Angeles.

Profile: Bernard Malamud

http://www.jewornotjew.com/profile.jsp?ID=621

My first experience with Malamud came in 11th grade English class, when "The Natural" was part of our summer reading list. When time came to write an essay on it, for some reason, the evil teacher was CONVINCED that I didn't read the book but watched the movie instead. Which I didn't! I had to spend half an hour after school trying to prove that yes, I actually read the book.

Now, "The Scarlet Letter", on the other hand...

Profile: Jerry Maguire

http://www.jewornotjew.com/profile.jsp?ID=620

We get a lot of requests to profile Tom Cruise... But he is so NOT Jewish, how can anyone think otherwise? So this is as close as we'll get.

I know, I know, I said that before. For NOW, this is as close as we'll get.

JONJ Recommends: Inglourious Basterds

When "Pulp Fiction" came out, Quentin Tarantino (Not a Jew) was derided in some circles for celebrating violence. However, most of that violence took place off-screen; this is not the case in "Basterds". In fact, some of it so up close and graphic that it made my usually-desensitized eyes squirm. That being said...

It's a great, great movie. Emphasis on MOVIE. Yes, it's violent, and not historically accurate, and self-serving (oh, is it self-serving, especially the last line), but it's a great, great, great MOVIE. I loved it from the opening shot to that last line... even when my eyes were squirming.

And the Jews... Oh, the Jews. We can easily get half a dozen JONJ profiles out of it (of course, B.J. Novak is already in the books). You'll probably see at least one "Basterds"-related profile in the near future.

And seriously, the Jews. It's a movie about Jews killing Nazis. How can you go wrong with that?

JONJ Rating: 5 / 5.

Profile: Seven Dwarfs

http://www.jewornotjew.com/profile.jsp?ID=619

According to the Disney folk, it is spelled Dwarfs, not Dwarves. This really bothers me, but I'm certainly not going to get into a spelling argument with the all-powerful Mouse (especially now that they've got Wolverine on their side).

Profile: Robert Moses

http://www.jewornotjew.com/profile.jsp?ID=618

Those readers who are too young to remember (or old enough to have forgotten) what New York City was like before the mid-90's rebirth need only to go rent "Escape from New York" (or listen to Billy Joel's "Miami 2017," for that matter) and realize that this result was considered fairly inevitable at the time.

While it would be unfair to give Robert Moses full credit for what befell Manhattan (other cities suffered similar violence and economic depression in the late 70s and early 80s), it's also naive to simply ignore his significant contribution to that sad state of affairs. The NYC that stands today--unrecognizable to the 1970s visionary in that it is still standing--exists despite Moses' contributions, not because of them.