Oh, those meshuggenah goyim! The Church as a Book Critic

Since I'm a sucker for allegories, I read José Saramago's Nobel-winning novel "The Gospel According to Jesus Christ". It's not bad at all, if you get past all the "Son of God" mumbo-jumbo, which, with this topic, is obviously hard. I prefer Christopher Moore's "Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal", but...

No, I'm not gonna downplay it. I liked Saramago's book. Obviously, I read it in translation, but it was excellent. Not to give any spoilers away, but, while it stays true to the New Testament (as far as I can tell, obviously the New Testament is not my strong suit), its interpretation of Jesus' life is not exactly... traditional. Which makes the book.

But you know who didn't like the book? The Catholic Church. (Surprised? Of course not!) The Church accused the novel to be a "substantially anti-religious vision". Which is... well, short-sighted.

See, this is what separates us Jews from the goyim. To us, the Bible is always open to interpretation. It's not black and white. We Jews have spent centuries trying to find different meanings in those words. The goyim? It's the word of God. End of story.

But is it? Really? Seriously, goyim, read your New Testament. Aren't there large gaps in Jesus' life? Couldn't those gaps be filled with Saramago's interpretation? Shouldn't you use your brain to think and not just fanatically believe whatever "the good book" tells you?

Besides, it's literature. FICTION. Lighten up.

Oh, those meshuggenah goyim!